To get a ticket you must have exact change to insert into the machine or else you don't get change back! So for those last two days, we ah... *cough* didn't have the exact change! And as it's an honour system, it's not checked regularly, though they do have spot checks.
Anyhoo, there we were talking and laughing on the bus when the spot check inspectors get on the bus asking for everyone's tickets. Needless to say, if you get caught without one, you're in big trouble!
When they first got on, I just sat there thinking "oh crap!" while Mudia was totally clueless next to me and going on about lawd knows what. So as we only had 30CHF between the both of us, I did the unthinkable.
I started speaking in English and pretended I didn't speak or understand ANY French.
I know, I should feel bad, but Mudia and I both agree that if the inspector wasn't so mean, patronizing and condescending I would have given him all the necessary details! but nooooooooo, that "stupid-foreigners-with-no-tickets-get-on-my-nerve" look made me do it! (or he was having a bad day... but like...who cares!?)
So yeah there I was, understanding every word the inspector was saying and pretending I DIDN'T... it's a hard feat I tell you! I took out my passport and gave it to him while Mudia's nudging me cos he (the ever so true American) didn't get why I was giving my passport so freely to complete strangers. [Note to future visitors, you must always have a piece of ID on you if you're traveling around Switzerland. It's the law.]
The mean inspector then went off to get his colleague who spoke English and after I explained that we were tourists with no coins but 30CHF, they made us get off in front of the UN and were speaking in French about what to do with us. The English speaker was telling his colleagues (in french) that he thought we were pretending to be tourists (HEY! one of us was!!) but as they couldn't really prove it they were about to let us go. But then they turned back to Mudia and asked for his passport and boy oh boy, all hell broke loose!
Just imagine this, an Atlanta-raised black bitchy boy demanding to know WHY they wanted his passport and WHAT the relation was with him not having a ticket. Also imagine him clutching his bag and doing the whole finger waving thing (à la 'Oh no you didn't!') then turning to me and in an exasperated voice he says "Girrrrrrrrrl! I am feeling harRASssed!"
I took a deep breath, gave him a look to shut up and turned on my nice, Samoan charm to full blast. This is what I meant:
"Sir, I am soooooooooo sorry. We've been walking around Geneva and just didn't have any coins to pay for our tickets. We don't have any credit cards on us, but we are staying with a friend in 'Grand-Saconnex' (said with a very strong American accent) and we just want to do right. Tell you what, you keep my passport and we'll go home to get some money and come back and collect it from you with the money. We leave tomorrow and of course I'll need my passport then. Sir, please. Sir, believe us. We only wanted to see the United Nations. I swear Sir. And... and... look (brings out the 30CHF in her pocket) look we have 30CHF that we can give you, it's all we have for now!" *pleading eyes,choked up voice and raised arms*
Inspector pauses, turns to his colleagues and says (in French of course):
"Guys, I think she's sincere. She really means it and you can tell. Let's just let them go ey...."
*bows*
In the end they let us go, after making us buy 24hr tickets to cover our "last" day in Geneva. We walked off quietly onto the UN plaza, pretending to take pictures and then laughed our heads off into the quiet night.
And so I leave you with the end product of another crazy adventure in swisshamo's life. A happy and relieved friend smiling not because he's in front of the UN but because he had just witnessed the best Oscar-winning performance of all time!
Happy week everyone!!
The charmed one
PS. I buy a ticket EVERY time I get on a bus now!!!!!!!!!
1 comment :
serves you right woman... LMAO but honestly that was funny! you just made my day :)
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