90 years old...

...and still going strong. That's my grandmother for you. She turned 90 two weeks ago and I've been thinking a lot about her and really missing her. She is one heck of a character and she has had a turbulent and colourful life filled with everything under the sun from love to betrayal to loss to contentment. Then again DUH! that's what happens when you live to see 90 years go by!

Anyway, here is what I wrote about her last year after she had had a bad fall and was hospitalized. I spent 3 weeks looking after her in hospital. Anyway, I reread it today and had a good laugh reminiscing about her ways. I also talked to a cousin today and well, she hasn't slowed down one bit. Everyone under the sun is a ufa, kae or alelo and in the same breath, she will bless and pray for you. Go figure.


Facebook Note written on 1 July 2010.

I miss my ulucrack Mama so much...

... I thought I'd gather lil snippets of umm interesting moments in the last three weeks looking after her:

1. On the first day she fell, we rushed her to the hospital in an ambulance and got her ready for an x-ray. As she was about to go in and get x-rayed, with a million other people waiting in line she proceeds as follows:

Mama: Autu, fia pi.
me: ummm Mama, ea?
Mama: Fia pi
me: But Mama, ea pe a e faakali o lea o le a fai lau faaka. Its ready now.
Mama (giving me this stubborn look and in a very loud voice so that the whole hospital could hear): E le mafai ga faakali o lea ua kumu la'u kaga mimi!!!!!!!
me (dejectedly gives in)

2. Mama's quite heavy and she needs a lot of help to stand. We needed to get her up at one time but she was in a LOT of pain (remember, fractured spinal disc - NO GOOD!) and she was trying to keep it together but quietly crying from the pain. I was in front of her, trying to hold her arms while the boys held her from the back. All we heard was the following:

"Auoi! Lou kua e... Faakali faakali la.... Auoi! Auoi! Eh!! se ka'i elo kele guku a gei kausima'i!!!!"

(Paladi old woman!!!)

3. Now if you don't know my dad's family, you wouldn't know that their God given talent is ACTING. Yes, if the everyday drama in our family is nominated for the Oscars - they would win every category hands down! Anyhoo, I digress. So here is my old lady being monitored at the hospital and on this first visit she had only a bruised back muscle (fracture came later), but the way she was moaning it was like the end of the world. This is our award winning script:

Mama: Autu.... Autu e.... o ou koe ikula gei! O ou koe ikula gei.... (repeated for dramatic effect)
me (rolling eyes): Mama, se aua e ke faapega... ga o lau kua gae bruised, you just need rest.
Mama: Leai ... o ou koe ikula gei. I can feel it.
me (still rolling eyes): Ia ok...........................Ia oki loa. Oki ia ma le kiga o kaliga
Mama: (long pause) Ai kae lou alelo!!!!
me: Ia lea... avaku lau saguisi fuamoa e ai, fai mai le fomai e magaomia ga e ai.
Mama (happily munching away and totally forgetting her antics 10s ago): Fefe e, ai o la'u last supper legei
me: Last what Mama?!
Mama: Ai o lau supper legei...
me: You mean, like Jesus's last supper? The egg sandwich?
Mama: Eh, se kailo ia....kaukala soo lou guku!!!

4. She acquired some infections and a couple of times she had bad fevers, and she gets so hot that it causes her to shiver. Usually, I would talk to her and ask her questions to distract her from the pain as we tried to bring down the fever. This is one question which she answered, and the answer meant the fever was coming down:

Q. Mama, o ai lou igoa akoa?
A. (shivering with eyes closed) O.... o.... o UFA!!!!!!!

Then she started grinning....

5. Another one of her classic moments was like something out of Braveheart:

Despite the pain, all we heard her saying in English was:

"I will FIGHT! I will fight to the last! I will FIGHT til the end!!!!"

And after this lil moment, her three soldiers aka the kausima'is cheered their hearts out like they were going into battle!

6. Spending time with her has meant I've learnt so much about my family history. I now know who married who, who got pregnant to who, who raised who, who had an affair with who, who beat up who and who is a fiapoko, a fia kagaka, a fia aikae, a le mafaufau, a keige lelei, kama lelei etc etc...

7. She loves to speak English to the nurses and doctors. And may I add, that Mama's English is like Queen's English. Oka se posh. Here are some conversations she's had with them:

Mama: Hello Nurse, how are you?
Nurse: Manuia lava, ea mai oe?
Mama: I'm fine, I'm fine. Just my back.
Nurse: Ia ua lelei, o le a fai lau tui ma faainu au fualaau.
Mama (dismissively): Whatever Nurse
Nurse: Ia ua uma. (exits)
Mama (without skipping a beat): Ai loga e iloa e le la pogaua le uiga o le whatever.

Doctor: Imoa, o a mai oe? Ua a lau faalogo i lenei taeao.
Mama: I'm much better doctor
Doctor: O lea e lelei lau suka, lelei lau blood pressure paua le mea tatau na e toaga e inu vai
Mama: Oh! but I do doctor. I do drink water. Lots of it.
Doctor: Ia lelei tele. Ma taumafai e faagaioi au vae e te exercise ai.
Mama: Fine, I will do that.
Doctor: Manuia lou aso (exits)
Mama: O a exercise o le a fai gei o lea e kigaiga kagaka! Isa!!!

And there you have it, some of MANY MANY MANY examples of Mama's crazy antics. I talked to her early this morning and I was so happy to hear improvement in her voice. Sunema who was with her then said she was improving slowly but surely. Her strength and fighting spirit truly inspires me and I am so thankful for the time I've spent with her!!!!